'Tis the Season to be Boring

Julie and I were at TJ Maxx recently. It's her favorite store on earth.

"Let's go to TJ Maxx!" she says.

And I say, "Okay."

That's what good husbands are supposed to say.

There isn't a whole lot for men to look at in T.J. Maxx. But there are clothes and a table of those "gifts for men" that you hope you"ll never actually receive.

They should rename it the "out of ideas and low on money" table. The stuff there takes the title for least actually used, least overall quality and shortest-lasting desirability. Stuff like those little flying helicopters (guaranteed to enthrall for seven minutes!) and snowball throwers.

That's right, snowball throwers. It's a kind of narrow paddle that will help you pack a good snowball and then you can throw it from the paddle.

Hope I see that under my Christmas tree!

Hanging near the checkout line was another item for men--the facial hair trimmer. They didn't actually declare it was for men on the package, but we all know who grows all the ugly facial hair!

That facial hair trimmer sent a little shiver up my spine.

All that little trimmer would have to do is pull just a little bit on those nose hairs--and you would hear horrifically shrill screaming from our bathroom.

No, thanks. I think I'll just stick with the ol' scissors.

On the way out of TJ Maxx, Julie asked, "Do you want anything?"

"No," I said.

Sometimes I even walk out of WalMart (my favorite store) without buying anything. I used to think buying nothing at WalMart was a physical impossibility. I mean, anything you really need you can buy at WalMart, right?

But I often find that, looking at everything, I want nothing.

Not the old me, let me tell you!

I used to want everything. And if they brought it out in another color, I'd want that too!

Most of the time now, when my family asks me what I want for Christmas, I really don't know.

Maybe it's age. "Stuff" has lost most of it's shine. We older people have seen it all before.

But I think it's really Jesus.

When I'm close to Jesus, I don't really care if I have the latest stuff.

Internet phone? Maybe someday. Hot car? All I see are payments. High-class clothes? Coffee stains.

Jesus satisfies me so well--in my soul, where it counts--that I find myself more and more content.

And that's a good feeling.

But it makes me boring at Christmas.

Sorry.